Floss for A Cause

This goes out to my San Diego:

Coach Carriers

Dooney Danglers

Louis Luggers

Gucci Graspers

Patron Pourers

Henny Holders

iPhone Flossers

Blackberry Braingers

G1 Janglers


You showed me you got it. Now make it drip like wah-duh.

Holla at me or text 619-971-1384 for more info
Do something with your $$$ other than try to make someone else feel less than!
BIG UP instead of BRING DOWN, ya punk clown!

Coochie Vendetta Coochie COOCHIE VENDETTA

Watch this, ya punk bish.
TELL ME Soulja Boy, Gu-chay!, and Shawty Old Lo and their Romper Room raps on "Gucci Bandana" ain't knockin', though. This is THE SavvyFatty Shower Monkey-Shakin' shit right now!

Now, say the title of the post aloud.
You over there rockin' now, ain'tcha?


So last week, my TWomegirl, Shercole of Minority Weirdos, brought, "Coochie Vendetta" into my life's lexicon by stating that this is what Soulja's chorus sounds like to her.
And, for that: I'm forever changed because: Twas she right... or twas she RIGHT?!?!

Anywhoo, we had a short TWonvo about actual coochie vendettas. I suggested founding a "Coochie Revenge Society" where our coochies could conduct covert operations to unleash our coochie vendettas, Coochie COOCHIE VENDETTAS on those who've wronged the coochay.

'Coley-Cole just laughed; I was dead-azz.


So, ladies, I pose this question:
WHO would your coochie have a vendetta out against?
And WHY?

Bounce to the comments and let's SEMI-air it out! INITIALS! And DETAILS!

And on the contrary: If your coochie has been blessed to have never been wronged and since the Holla-Daze are upon us:
Who would your coochie send a Christmas card to?

I'll pop it AWF! in the comments...FOLLOW ME, NAH!

Rep Yo' PIGGAY!

What's better than Oprah?

For those of you who answered: "Miley Cyrus and Kim KardASShian butt-nekkid-buffin' the Honda with a large side of Tyra Banks shutting the hell up and letting her guests tell THEIR stories-SANS interruptions and interjections in order to Keyshia Cole the people by annoyingly trying to drive home the point that "I'M JUST LIKE YOU!" because she must be blind or need some glasses to see that we've heard her fivehead fables and simply don't give a fuck anymore," **breathes and stops** then you'd be CLOSE.

However...survey says: MORE OPRAH!

Last week, Lady O dropped the dime on herself by admitting the fact that she's double-fisting 100 pounds.
However, unlike Lady Lane Bryant behind this blog righ'chea, she isn't proud of her poundage and is actively planning a curb-the-curves coup.

**looks lovingly into the eyes of my BabyMama #1 prize while pinching playfully at her baby fat-fat**
I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU AAARRREEE!!!

**slyly slips hand around to her purse, to ensure it hasn't lost any weight**

In honor of my sugahunnyicedtea, I'll go ahead and let y'all know about the weight I'm working with.
Cuz, sheeiiit: If a bia bia like Opreezy can be honest about her obesity, then so can SAVVistra FATTerline, dammit!

So listen up kids, cuz this ish is like the Halley's Comet of revelations: ONCE in a lifetime.

My weight...**inhales deeply; feels immediate moistening of brows and palms**
...could very easily be the model number of Mercedes Benz.
**exhales**

WHOOOO!!!!! Fuck shackles off my feet; THAT was freeing!

Ok...
Who's next to come clizzean?
;^p

Tres Preguntas: The Health, Safety & Well-being Edition

1) Why does it take my hard-headed arse dayum near two weeks of knocking on death's door like, "Hola, Grim Reepito!" before I get up, get out, and drag my ass to the doctor to unfortunately, spend my weed'lowance get the proper, legal, prescriptions and doc-ordered bed rest necessary to return me back to tip-fat shape?



2) Why is it OK for your non-minority superior to joke and say, "Git'urr DUUUHHNNN!" yet, you'd be putting your job and income in jeopardy if, after exhibiting exemplary skills that you're quite certain neither your boss nor coworkers possess, by exclaiming:



3) Even though I DO NOT condone violent reactions to most situations:
Why can't I get enough of this?

You Betta WORK!

Top O'The Morn, Ye Ol' SavvyFAT'Liens!

Jeeeeaahhhh! I knew a little beefy Bex showing those high-priced BVDs who's boss would get your juicies going cray-yay-zee! MC's ack like they don't know!


After 5 lousy, dizzays :-( of chillin' like an illy-feelin' villain, I've finally returned to a normal temperature! Now finger clap, ehh!
My forehead has finally ceased production of salty oceans of sweat and I can half-way speak a whole sentence without sounding like Peter Brizzady. (0:37 mark; Also, please note how NONE of the Bradys are part of a Rhythm Nation, especially Puberty Pete. D'oh!)

Today, I thought I'd switch it up a bit since this IS the month that our (well, "some " of our; This is America! I like to exercise the 'T' word) Lord and Savior was born.
Instead of our usual Hump Day Holiday in the middle of the week, I'll introduce you to something far more tame and "family-friendly." Because if you've ever read anything on SavvyFatty, you KNOW I'm AAALLLL about family.
I'm like the McDonald's of Bloggers; the Sunday afternoon crowd at Hometown Buffet of the Blogging World; a 90s Friday night tuned into ABC type of Blogging Biatch, riiiigghhhttt?!

Haha!


What IS "Work It! Wednesday!," you ask?
Well, it's just me being me highlighting someone who I believe is WORKIN' IT! in whatever they do.
I don't mean ho-hum, everyday working it. NO!
I'm talmbout: WORKIN' IT!
Going for DOLO and doing them at all costs and being BAD AZZ at it. And not someone who's already been put on for their city; but someone who is doing the dayum thizzang; someone who has yet to receive proper shine for whatever it is that they BANG at.
Know someone like this? Get at me and let me know what they're all about!


So, ninjas and beaches, I introduce you to:
"Work It! Wednesday!"


And you better like it!