Showing posts with label YAAAYYY YOU. Show all posts
Showing posts with label YAAAYYY YOU. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Peace, BITCH!


Danity Kane resident hoochay mama, Aubrey O'day, was chunked the deuces by Diddy on last night's ep of Making the Band 4.center>

After going at Puff about not "communicating" with the group about the solo plans of other DK members, Aubrey was shown the proverbial "door" and still sat there with the, "So...and?" look on her face like she was Chris Breezy and she ran it, RAN IT!
At that exact moment is when my blood pressure rose from warm milk to Top Ramen water. Her azz better be GLAD she wasn't a member of Savvity Kane...cuz I woulda had a fist full of blonde Great Lengths and been employing my fists of fury like noooooobody's beeswax.
You're FIRED! BITCH, STEP! You're Unemployed! DONEski! Bounce, biatch!

It took all my GATDAYUM strength not to pry my TV open to dap that ninja Puff up. That biatch beeeeennnnnn needing the boot. She's an attention-loving HO bizzag who thinks her shit don't staink just cuz Puff bigged her talent up during the group's formation.
Diddy dayum sure showed her azz who was BAWSS and I loved it!!!!
What did YOU think about Diddy giving "Auberella" the bizzoot?

Monday, September 8, 2008

Sav'VMAs

"Happy" Monday, SF'ers!

Hope everybody made it on the flipside of the weekend safely. Hope in 9 months we won't be havin' no showers for no SF'ers babies... :^p

The VMAs rolled back around this year, with a new host, Russell Brand. (Yeah, don't ask me!)
But, TrillVille: I haven't watched a VMAs from start to finish in YEARS. And, I really didn't start last night, either. But I did manage to leave the TV on MTV while I did other ish.
And, really, I only tuned in to see if the lovely lady(<<--no, fa real! No HeadShave!) below was gonna slap the taste outta muhfuckas mouths by giving the people a Classic Britney VMA performance after last year's "D'oh!" fest.
Although she didn't perform, she still redeemed herself in part.

So...follow me nah and see the VMAs through the LensSavvyFatty.



Britney Schpeerz (<--word to South Park's Shelley Marsh)
Bitch was looking uncrazy good!
Face was beat; dress was hot. She might actually regain her early 2-thou'z SavvyFatty BILF status back as I didn't see extension-pod ONE.
Can we say: UPGRADE?!
Damn, it feels good to see people up on it!...(even though THIS, from her downfall days, is HI-LAIR-E-YUS! People are so cool CRUEL!)
But, fa real: What's the deal with her winning all these VMAs?! 'Pity' is NOT just a word that rhymes with 'shitty' (as in her performance from last year).
Shit, I didn't even know she had a song out. Guess cuz I didn't know MTV still played videos. **shrugs**

*****


Rihanna
Since I avoid radio like pregnancy and weight loss, I'd never heard "Disturbia" all the way through until tonight.
And trilly, I could have used another 340+ months without having what I call the OPPOSITE of the "pleasure." **blech**
Guess my inching-towards-30-like-a-Nick-Hogan-driven-Toyota-Supra ears just cain't digest pointless pop like this anymore. I would have done better to watch this performance on MUTE cuz Rih-Rih was LOOKING hot. However, I can always live my life without her daughter-of-Keith-Sweat baaaa'ing.
The hair and makeup: Type-FLAWLESS! That's the kinda shit I'd rock if I didn't have to sit in a cubicle slavin' for the gubmit on a 5x/week basis.
But...Who knows?! Maybe one day when I stop caring about such trivial things as food, water and shelter you can find me by the copy machine rockin' a punky pomp-shag, floor-length tail type'a thang.

*****


Host Russell Brand
I respect his brevity with the "Elect Obama!" statement. Me loves it, lad! Brave, much?!
Just hope Dick Cheney wasn't tuning in with his Suge-Knight-pre-ass-whoopin'-mind on. He mighta holla'd at his Vegas goons to Harry Whittington a muhfucka after the show. Let's hope not. **tunes to Headline News**
**Sidenote: Why could I only understand Russ when I WASN'T looking at the screen? 'Tardation is not just a Palin family thang, fam!

*****


NoAssJonas Brothers
Don't really have much to say about these lil' ninjaz except: REP YO' PROMISE RAINGS!!!
**Real talk: Maybe if some of us would have rocked ours like these young "rock" stars we wouldn't have the problems we have NOW.
Anywhoo...Anybody who's ever been to Sea World San Diego in the 80's and early 90's remember that stage show they had called, "City Streets?" (YES! I'm an ANCIENT HEAD!)
Tell me the facade they performed in front of didn't remind you of the City Streets show? 'Member: The one where dudes in plaid shirts, spandex, and tap shoes were supposed to be "hood?"
No?
Guess that's just the John McCain in me...**tears**

*****


Olympic Gold Medalist Michael Phelps
Wake me when you handin' swimming ass-whoopins to the world...or after you've finished presenting Lil' Wayne, Leona Lewis, and Sooty McSootersteen. Shit! May as well have been raining and pouring cuz SavvyFatty was type-snoring!


Lil' Wayne (ft. Leona Lewis and T-Pain)
Besides being the size of my pinky finger, Weezy-Weez can do ZERO wrong in my eyes right now. Lyrically and musically, he's NOT to be fucked with!
Eff the fact that he was sagging SKINNY JEANS (...pause...) and I saw more of his bootay cheeks than his face (not missing much ANYdayumway) or the fact that he didn't let me hit at Nelly & JD's All-Star Weekend party in Vegas in Feb. '08, I liked the performance.
Wish MTV would have had their usual pit of TRILL party people right at the stage giving Wayne the energy he deserved instead of those boring azz, uninspiring industry folks and middle-aged Y Ts, but hey. Whatevz!
Leona Lewis did her thang on "Misunderstood!" Run me a LimeWire download of this performance ASAP! She spit straight soul to that mic! LOVED IT!

*****


Ciara & Lindsay Lohan
Ayy, Ci-Ci: Khandi Alexander's NewsRadio wig requested to be placed back in the costume closet at NBC for use by someone OVER the age of 160 in the future. Please.And.Thank.You!
And LiLo: Ya betta cover up them goodays. Sammy Ro looks like she packs a MEEEANNN domestic violence backhand, yo.

*****


Pink
LOVED her hair!! Reminds me of the years I negro'hawked and rocked the short 'do.
The song and performance was cool. Pink rocked the City Streets facade, too. AND All while remaining the hottest dude I've EVER seen in a rubber bodysuit. EXCELLENT tuck-job, yo!
Haha!
Trill talk: I love me some Pink. Any bitch who unapologetically says what she feels is on my "Fuck Witchu" list.
BIG UPS, 'Lecia!!!

*****


Jordyn Sparks & John Legend
Big Woman. Little Man. Football player's shoulders. Bitch Lips. THE END.

*****




T.I. (ft.Rihanna)
What in the ghey-azz High School Musical, ghetto Rat Pack hail was going on as Tip performed the song that makes me want to crank dat Marlee Matlin?!
And of course homebitch could have had whatever she liked...cuz you could have WHATEVER you like for a small fee, too. Bitch looked like she had coupons for $5 suckey-suckies on DIZZECK.
That "Live Your Life" performance was fiyah, though. Even with Rih's negr'yodelin'. Plus the biatch got a body that won't QUIT. Let me put the Chipotle down long enough to bless my existing schwag with a flat stomach like 5TonHead and see if I won't rock a Saran-wrap bikini top with my skin-tight jeans on the DAILY.
Just cuz I ain't achieve it (so I extra-cheese it!) I ain't gon' "Mo'Nique" a ho' at all. I'mma tip my hat, grab her camel toe and say, "DO YA THANG, beeyatch!"

*****


Christina Aguilera
I had to put the "flute" down and pick my bifocals up.
ChrissyAg: Datchu, homay?
MTV: Y'all sure the performers didn't get switched up and Blondie ain't come out with some new hot shit on deck for the kiddies?
C. Ag was chunky...but funky. Do ya thang, MILFy McMILFerford!

*****


Tokio Hotel

Guess Bjork is on her MiJac "Bad" tour ish, no?
Haha!
Naw, that ain't the ex-SugarCubes sugah baby. It's just the androgynous frontman of German band, Tokio Hotel, Bill Kaulitz, doing him as the band accepted the "Best New Artist Award."
Oh!...but before they go...an 80s Patti LaBelle called...

*****


LL Cool J
E-mutherfucking-NOUGH with the puffy paints and glitter.
We get it: You got some ish coming out and are on ya grizzy trying not to Todd Smith the project. GOTCHU!
But real rap: That "Baby" shit ain't NUUUHHHFFFIN' but a fork-in-the-garbage-disposal sounding rehash of "Headsprung."
Won't front: I do get my head-noderation on to The Dream's part.
You can search but you never gon' find/A neck that's missing like miiinnne

*****


Kid Rock (ft. Lil' Wayne)
**Sidenote: I've never had the pleasure of sharing air space with Kid Rock, but for some reason I think if I did he'd smell like snot, rotten cucumbers, and pigs' feet water. Oh! And Hepatitis crumbs...
Since that's neither here nor there...
I really didn't pay attention to his performance with Lil' Weezyana. But when I did take the opportunity to glance over at the screen, I kept having trailer-park-meets-projects visions and "Say Say Say" moments.(<<--Mac & Jac, anyone?)

*****




Kanye West
**gets my Tyrese on** HAVE I TOLD YOU I LOVE YOU LATE-LAY?! HAVE I TOLD YOU YOU'LL NEVER BE "CUNTY" TO ME?!

Ninja.ROCKED.that.shit!!!!!!!!
Pure, unadulterated, understated DOPENESS.
'Ye's vocals were surprisingly GRAVY. The drums: IGNORANT! HOT!
This muhfucka consistently blurs the lines of heterosexuality musical genres while STILL reppin' for Hip Hop. I admire AND applaud the way he steps outside the proverbial box to exhibit "'Riginality" at its finest ALWAYS.
New rap dudes: TAKE NOTES and aspire to EXCELLENCE.
**locks eyes with Kanye, then drops to knee with Jacob box ajar**

All photos snatched from Getty Images and WireImage via MTV

Whatchu think?!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

The Devil Is The Troof!

**E-VEEL LAUGH**

RARARARARARARRRRRRR!!!!

Remember when I busted the pussy that was Jay-Z's Vegas locale of The 40/40 Club wiiiiiiide open?!?!
Well, looka here. LOOKA HERE! BOY! LOOKA HERE!


The Devil Is The Troof!!!!!

I'd like to think I played a hand in this. To those who did NOT fall victim to the anal wallet-raping, unlike me and my girls, and avoided that bullshit azz place like The Plague and now NEVER have to worry about going to that beeyatch: Uhhh... YOU'RE WELCOME!

Now...Please repeat after me. There's only one rule: I.WILL.NOT.LOSE
!

Monday, August 11, 2008

Who and WHO attended WHAT now?!

The BET Blackbuster Movies Studios must be somewhere lookin' like "Nawlins" after Hurricane Katrina hit and all its residents evacuated to some VFW lounge in Inglewood as a church bus full of Z-list "celebrities" packed the "A Conversation with Young Hollywood" event, which was part of the 12th Annual American Black Film Festival held in Los Angeles over the weekend.
Church's Chicken and the ice cream man reportedly catered the event.

A $5 EBT card plus an all expenses paid vacation to Chateau Savvy to wash my dishes and my feet goes to the first SavvyFatty'er who can name EACH and EVERY one of the Most Known Unknowns pictured below AAANNND can name 3 FILMS they've appeared in.


Ready! Set...GO!!!



Wednesday, August 6, 2008

They Want Me With My Hands Up!

Shoootaaaa-aaahh-aahhh-ahhhhh!
Yeah! Shouts to Lil' Weezy for jumpin' on that track with Robin Thicke and soundin' like a drunken Southern dayum salamander. HOTNESS!

Lil' Kim and gal pals LisaRaye (R) and Angel Lola (L) Luvin' The Way You Tryna Pass That Azz Off As Yours celebrated her tittays' 8th nose's 2nd facelift's 6th birthday this week by throwing back shots at a party at Spotlight Live in the NYC.

The Queen Bee, obviously bustin' the MC Hammer if you were to pan out, looks aw'ight in these flicks; I gotta admit it. She's not lookin' like the usual Choco Crypt Keeper we've grown to loathe over the past 8 or more years.
Too bad nobody's hardly checkin' for her music anymore, though. The only way I'd get down with the Queen again was if she went on a world tour wearing her old short hair (a la Aaliyah's "If Your Girl Only Knew" {0:27 & 0:33 marks}vid) and every outfit from the "Crush On You" {<<--My fave!} vid.
SavvyFatty'ers: You know I love the way you feel-a/Sip my Tequila/Heard from the dealahz/All in chinchillas

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Cinnamon Toast Ush

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Is it just me and my fabits (that's fat girl habits) or is looking at Usher's face causing you to fiend for a Saturday-morning-while-watching-Pee-Wee's-Playhouse bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?
Somebody left this cover in the Photoshop Tanning Booth for 1,862 seconds too long. Even Lil Fif's (cuz typing 'Usher Raymond V' was plain ol' NOT an option) lips are steppin' to the black side.

What in the Djimon Honsou hail?!

Oh yeah, and if you ain't noticed, Ursh is giving the world a chance to peep the results of him and Tameka's science experiment for the August cover of Essence. Lil' Fif is a very cute little one; I won't front. Just hope they had him back on the set of Idlewild before Bryan Barber yelled, "ACKSHUN!" and the Costume Department noticed some shit missin'.

Oh! And I hope Ursh ain't make no munnay from these flicks being out for the public to see. Cuz iffin' I remember, he scoffed at the idea of using his child to make money. Guess since Here I Stand ain't movin' the units he's used to, minds change when ya dimes change, no?

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

ChampWayne

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According to Vibe.com, Lil Weezyanna is getting his own brand of champagne. The line, called "Halo" [/Type 52 Diabetes] will be coming to a freezer within the Liquor, Ribs and Check Cashing Spot near you in the fall.
The article states the line will feature variations such as Halo Brut and Halo Penisful Pinnacle, which is a Chardonnay with fruit and nut flavors. Sashay! Chante!

I got 500 half pennies that says this shit tastes like week-old etouffe and Baby's spiderweb dust precum.

WhatCHU thank?!

Monday, June 30, 2008

Since I Been GONE...YEAH! YEAH!

**This post is dedicated to my squad of cute big biatches, especially Miss J-Nic from the Myspace page, wonderin' if a SavvyFatty was breavin' or not. Yo' Luhhhv...It means the world to me! [/Musiq]
*****
Now..."OWN" with the fuckery!!!!


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This past Saturday, American Idol’s pillow-top mattress-shaped stepchild, Ruben Studdard, wifed up fiancée Surata Zuri McCants.

The bride, best known for her .00123 seconds of shame fame in Nelly’s "Tip Drill" video** (3:20 mark; extreme right in white bikini top) couple asked that in lieu of throwing rice, the crowd would "make it rain" with singles instead. In exchange, the bride stripped down to her g-string, garter, and stiletto clear heels to drop and give the guests 50.
**Warning: Video not safe for work OR people with no arms because you’re most DEF going to want to be rubbing some nether regions with a blunt and bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios nearby…or was that just me?!
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*****


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Uhhhh…what dee HAIL do you think Britney circa 2019 Heather Locklear was doing when this pic was snapped?!
Please vote below:
C) Just finished saying “Peace Up;” in the midst of shouting, “A-Town Down!!”
OR

B) Chunking the deuces at the Po-Po after they tried to pop her for snatching Denise Richards's wig back.
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*****


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**screaming while tearing at afro puff**
JESUS, WHY?!?!?!
**on knees sobbing**

Why?!?!?
First, I was first to live with the news that Mini-Me aka Verne Troyer, has a sex tape with a real-live, regular-sized woman. **spits vomit to the ground**
Now, while reading The Superficial I have to be inundated with midget nipple slippery?!?!? Moonlight Bunny Ranch alum, Bridget the Midget, let her lil' nipple out of her wee whore wear this past Friday in Hollywood.
Why, Lawd?!?!? What have I done?!?!?! **taking negative 36.3 million seconds to ponder**
I know that that was that woman’s husband, Lawd. I did (and do) know that. But…he got an 8!
But this?!!!! My EXTREME baaaadddd!!!!

*****


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**handing my tongue the phone while relaying a message**
SUH BAWTH THEE CAW LITH FO’ YOO…
Kim KardASShian celebrated lil' sis Chyna Khloe Kardasshian’s 24th birthday over the weekend by making my clit beat up my KY Warming Liquid- slathered pointer finger.
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*****


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Alicia Keys attended the 2008 Michael Strahan/Dreier LLP Charity Golf Tournament pre-party in the NYC this past weekend. The slight showing of a sexy, supple rounded hip is what made me post this pic as it reminds me (and my nipple erection) of when she looks like this...

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NFL alum Eddie George was also in the house; lips sponsored by MAC's new lip glass tint, Rainbow Raisin.

*****


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Destiny's StepChile' Letoya Luckett was also out this weekend, flossing in her gettin’-extra-hours-due-to her-BOGO-sales-promotion-skills attire, looking like a choco-firework in a bold patterned, off-the-shoulder number.
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*****

High Thought of the Night:

Who do you think is the villainous vixen trying to own and control Ne-Yo in his latest video, “Closer?”

Savvy’s Guess: None other than Miss Black Embarassment Herself,Miss Peachez (Ya Hea' Me?!)…cuz who else gon’ taste test a whole gatdayumed Thanksgiving-sized spread in negative 46 matrillion seconds to let you know if there’s enough fatback in the “grains” but Miss PokeChopWithNoHandsEatin’ Ne-yo-sha?

Thursday, June 19, 2008

A Dayum Shamie, Lynn Spears!!!

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Early Thursday morning, Jamie Lynn Spears gave birth to a lil' bastard baby girl.
What do YOU think were the first words JLS's new baby, Maddie Briann (<<--For my true folks: Isn’t that ironic?) uttered once she shook that womb like running outta King Tut's tomb?
Savvy's Guess:

Where’s my No Limit chain and Pen and Pixels birth announcement, whoadi?!


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Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Flavor in your Sinceer

If you're a reg'la SF'er, you know I LOATHE but still tuned in to [/embarrassed] all incarnations of the Flavor series'iz'zis. Especially this past season since resident "nemesis" Sinceer is reppin' my hometown.
DAYGO! DAYGO! HELLO! It's DAYGO! **doin' a 'Tard-Lite version of the Shawty-Lo**

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Being that Sinceer is currently a friend of mine via my personal Myspace, I came across a blog she wrote last night. Subject at a glance: HATERS

I'll refrain from giving my opinion (for a change. **checkin' Hell's temperature**) and allow you fine ladies and gents to form your own opinions about what Sinceer is spittin' via her Craigslist Erotic Services ad Myspace page.

**DISCLAIMER ALERT**
Being that I've already addressed the bullshit azz idea of 'hate' I'mma zip it and zip it good. I DON'T take that ish seriously because 'hate' is just another person's opinion. And we all know opinions are like shitty Pinky Starfishes: From time to time, we ALL have one.
As an adult, to embrace the concept of 'hate' is comical to me. But...to each their own. **shrugs**

As a single big biatch with a respectable, yet low-paying job and an equally low hanging bellay, I'd honestly rather be doing spending big face pennies than slaingin' ass like this....or that in order to get VIP to a club that's gon' get shot up 45 minutes to close ANYdayumway.

So before anybody fixes the their fonkay gums to say, "You just mad cuz YOU ain't on TV" or "Don't hate cuz YOU cain't!" I'll make the 'HURSH' gesture with my fangaz, quick-like, and say: "Ninja, puhleez."
Cuz while bitches these nice, young ladies were fugazi-ass-tear-manufacturin' and wishin' on that fallen star, I'z in a reg'la car, tokin' out with a candy bar. And mighty satisfied with it, too.

Plus, I knoooowww if I peruse the 'net long enough, I'm 1 tumillion% soy'tin I could find a site featuring bitches with the multi-pack belly AND back game out and about for the viewing pleasure of international credit card-swiping Club Chub admirers ready to get their Raspusha 'OWN', ok-k-k?
But I choose to no-exposed-tittay-or-ass-cheeks-involved low wage it and show my brain not give it by spittin' my life to this keyboard and blog.

Now that that's done...
Follow her nah if you give a fuck.


Well..... as you all know Sinceer is officially the most hated on Flavorette in Flavor of Love history!!! And I say that proudly. You never realize how many people out there have issues until you become the target of these losers!!!
Since the show has aired I've been constantly harrased (only online because nobody would dare talk shit in my face) as well as some of my supporters... I'm doing this blog not because these haters are bothering me.... but because they are bothering some of you....(<--Well, ain't that spesh'o? -Sav) sometimes these losers go thru the extent of creating a fake myspace profile request me as a friend.... wait for the friend request is approved and then post these dumb ass comments on my page like I give a fuck what they think.... some of my people see these comments and reply back with a comment and then the hater starts harrassing them.....
I just want my supporters to know ain't no way in hell is any of these things these people are saying affecting me (REALLY?! Then what's the reason for this blog?! Things that make you go "BULLSHIT!"-Sav) what so ever so if you see a loser on my page ignore them because I do... people talk about my forehead but Myamee's forehead is bigger then mine but nobody says shit about hers, (Aww. Another prime example of how it's NOT affecting you. I see you! -Sav)
damn bottle of wine, I get called a bad mom when Hotlanta admitted she ain't pay her rent to be on the show and Bunz admitted she was behind on bills and my bills were paid (how did I end up being called a bad mom),
I get called a backstabber when the twins backstabbed everybody in the beginning, Heezinz backstabbed Thing 1 and Black backstabbed Heezinz,
I get called uneducated when I have a bachelors degree, (Word?! Would love to see THAT side instead of the backside, crackside. -Sav) a job, and I'm one of the only girls in the house who don't live with my parents...these examples given are the reasons why I say I'm the most hated on because people only focus on "me" and try to find anything wrong with "me" and even make up shit...
if you ask me why I think I'm the most hated on the show.... it's because I was the strongest in the house... I was one of the most entertaining on the show.... I had the most self esteem and I didn't give a fuck what anybody thought about me (until the moment you sat down to compose this blog, riiiight? -Sav) ....
these haters are mad that I got on a tv show with my bad attitude while they're stuck behind a computer hating....
these haters are mad that with all the shit talking they did about my forehead and about my attitude I came on the reunion making sure my forehead showed and my attitude was even worse!!! (www.OBVIOUS.com -Sav)
So with that said I'm gonna continue to be me... the more haters I have the more I know that I'm doing something right otherwise they wouldn't have anything to hate on!!!!
And I know alot of yall can relate to what I'm goin thru with these losers cuz I see most of yall have haters too so we all must be doing something right!!!



Now that THAT'S over...**yawning, wonderin' if it's Good Morning time yet**

Why do YOU think she has so many haters?
  • IS it the forehead?
  • The OBVIOUS playing up for the cameras?
  • The fact that we've all seen this show before?
  • Or are we all just effin' bored with FOL alum **air quotes** bad ackin' and fresh-off-elimination-T&A-slaingin'?

My opinion is off limits so I shaln't. YOU make the call!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Showtime, Synergy!

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Well, wipe my ass with a Jigglypuff! Ain't Mimi-kins just a cute, sweet bundle of tacky cheesiness ultra-fashionable "youth?" I can't fucking stand love her retro coolness as she gets her Jem & The Holograms on at at the Tokyo Dome while on the Japanese leg of her E=I Don't Hardly Care promo tour.

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Celebrity Advice for the Day: Meemz, since it seems like your munk has a tapeworm that just can't be satiated, why not feed that savage beast AND save a BUNCH of Monistat money on wardrobe and stylists by having a fabric camel toe surgically attached to your peesh?

Friday, May 16, 2008

Savvy Fasties

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Peep who got the evening off from Dress Barn long enough to make a public appearance! Former AI'er Melinda Doolittle in her octagenarian pastor's wife's First Sunday best attends the 2nd Annual Millennium Promise and Malaria No More Benefit in New York City.


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When viewing this still from the movie Speed Racer, you're probably about to blow a gasket, thinking, "WOW! COOL!"
As for me...well, I'm sittin' over here thinkin' more like...


**leaving T-Pain a voicemail**
You better hope the devil don't still have the receipt for your soul. Cuz iffin' he does and decides to return it...here's what your future holds...
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Monday, May 12, 2008

**inhales...exhales**

Y'all hear that?!?!?!
**takes another deep breathe in...then exhales**
I kinda like doing that there...which is why I REFUSE to report on the fact that Marion "Suge" Knight, the West Coast's and music industry's resident strooonnnnnng arm steady, got KNOCKED DEE FUCK IZZOUT at Shag nightclub in LA this weekend.


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Photo jacked from: TMZ


If y'all wanna know more...and ain't afraid of someone recording your IP address and showing up at your door with their dangling-yo-azz-from-a-20th-floor-balcony hands ON DECK, read more here...

Thursday, May 1, 2008

They'll be after dem tittays next



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After missing 4 to 5 months worth of payments, rapper Lil Kim's Bentley was snizzatched unexpectedly from her home.

"Apparently, when Kim was asked to turnover the keys to the vehicle, the rapper told the repomen that her accountant would handle the situation. When, [New York's ] CW11 [news] attempted to receive comment from Kim on the falling economy and raising tide or repossession in auto, the disgruntled rapper began to curse at the reporter, telling him to leave her estate." SOURCE

Daaaayyyuuuum, homay!!
I just pray she has the pank slip for the rest of the shit she's purchased. Would suck to see her gracing the cover of a magazine looking like this.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Let's get gone! WALK IT OUT!

...You can doodoo pirate all by yo'seeeelllllf!

StAl has stalled.
Tell me this pic doesn't pretty much sum up the state of their union?
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photo peeped at WORDIZZ

After far too many years of fag-haggin' and 2nd linin' at the gay perr-raid (Shouts to Eli!) Star Jones has removed her rainbow-colored glasses and is travelling down the path to seek out a HETEROSEXUAL relationship.

Get the details. Follow me nah!

Monday, April 21, 2008

Damn, homay!

Ok. So, Bernard Hopkins let the Brit get all up in his grits at Saturday's fight.

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DAAAMMNN, homay! Against Calzaghe you wud'nt da man, homay! **wondering if Hop can smell what the glove was cookin'**

Ok. Enough of that since, thanks to Captain Morgan and 'nim, I didn't get to watch the fight anyway. Guess HBO thought they was too good to broadcast live from my toilet bowl.
HAYDUHZ!!! But that's neither here nor there.

Look who was in the house like Mighty Mouse! Front row centa' like, "Yeah! I'm DAT ninja!" (Yeah, I see Whitney, looking alive!!! I ain't EVEN gon' hate! All I'mma say is "YAY YOU!" and "GET DAT YOUNG COCK!")
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Wow!! What a difference a dick makes!
Before Ray dicked my babymama, Kim KardASShian, down (with a pants python that's MUCH too slim for myyyyy taste) nobody was checkin' for him. I GARE-RONE-TEE if this was just a couple of years back and he tried to sit FRONT ROW at a fight, the security guards would be like, "Wait a minute!" I bet Brandy wasn't even invited. Guess now since Ray's shinin' harder than his parents' daughter, she'll be labeled as "Ray J's sister"...or "Shawty Is a Killa!"

Thursday, April 10, 2008

UshMeka

TMZ caught the first glimpse of Usher Raymond V (No! Not 'V' like viagra or vag, genius!...V as in the Roman numeral for 5, scholar!) out with his pappy walkin' the skreets.

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Awwww!! Look at lil' Ushmeka in his teeny black hoodie and baby beanie...lookin' like he just came from pulling his first little lick. Ohh! Crib Crime! So precious!
And look at how baby UshMeka has a widdle tiny version of his daddy's scary Halloween hand. Awwww!