Seventeen year old Xochitl Parra secretly gave birth to an 8-pound, 3-ounce (AY, CHICO!) lil' nino while getting ready for school last Wednesday morning. Alone and unable to call for help since her home phone was disconnected, Xochitl walked 4 blocks to the nearest hospital with the baby still umbilically attached. Parra, a sophomore in high school, kept the pregnancy secret because she was afraid her mother would "kick [her] out of the house." Read more here...
MI DIOS! I cain't even imagine a teenager being pregnant for nine dayum months and secretly giving birth...**getting in time machine and rewinding back to February 3 in the year that Reagan was elected el Presidente**...HOL'UP! Yes, I can, as I was just a "bad stomach ache" up until I popped out, throwing up the 'W' like, "WHAT IT DEWWWWWW!!!"
Real talk though, I wish Xochitl and baby Alejandro nada pero the best. I hope Xochitl finishes high school and moves on to higher learning and a lucrative career so her and her son don't have to endure nights of Hot Dog and BBQ Sauce Rice and Thousand Island Dressing on Wonder Bread sammiches like I did coming up as the child of a pair of horny teenagers. **tears*
**hoping Ma-Dukes ain't SavvyFatty'in it today**