Friday, February 1, 2008

Yoo wown dee zyyy wit dat?

In her final semester at the Michael Jackson Don't Like the Man in the Mirror Institute for Race-Trading...Lil' Kim is finally living up to and NOT living up to her name as she's not so 'Lil' anymore (peep that MAX-PAK of chins!) and 'Kim' as in "Yoo git towz n nellz or jus nellz? I-bil-lau wax too?" Peep her Suzy Wu look and that frightening Kabukisha makeup lookin like Anna Nicole's casket twin.
Who's Lucy Liu in the background? The one Kim's interning for?


So many questions and so little patience!
Why she got on my grandma's good church scarf? The one she waves in the air when the pastor is "telling it!" The same one she wipes her Pancake 41 off with after she dun' broke a sweat from shoutin when "Jesus Will Work It Out" boomed from the church loudspeakers. The same one that probably TILL THIS DAY wreaks of a ghetto mix of White Diamonds and Passion.

And where's the other half of that jacket? Is this an optical illusion? Like the pic where you can't tell if the stairs or going up or down!?!?!?!!! I'm at work! Don't have time for a puzzle, dammit!!

And again, I'll ask why Frank E. Campbell let Stevie Wonder get his Maly Rincal on with her mug? (And I do use "her" mug lightly! Cuz you KNOOOW there's a Rubbermaid factory in Middle America missing a LOAD of inventory over her redux!)

I'm ALL ABOUT individuality. Lawd knows I am! I ain't nooooo stranger to danger!!! I got a pair of Superhero Red calf-height flat boots RIGHT NOW that I sport and support like nobody's biznaz. (SHOUTS TO my girl CAMILLE! GOOD LOOKIN!) However...I ain't seen this many colors in one outfit since George Clinton, Betsey Johnson, Pharrell Williams, a bag of Skittles and them Heatherette boys had a mid-afternoon orgy in my day dream!

**Sidenote: Is it just me...or do you want a Kraft American Singles grilled cheese sam'mich right about now after looking at that purse??!?!!

**SIDE Sidenote: Sorry to negate our proud history below with this tomfuckery right here. We SHALL overcome! Please believe it!!!!


lilmsfre said...