Exactly how many negative kadrilliseconds in advance did you know that you were being considered for the Veep spot on the Repubs' ticket before you accepted the position as Hilly C's Right Wing doppelganger?
Would your stance on birth control change if you'd known your own daughter favored Magic Stick as/or about as much as Larry "Wide Stance" Craig?
How were your years on "Saturday Night Live?"
Is there ANYthing colder than an eskimo's pussy?
Have you seen T-Baby's "It's So Cold In The D?"
If so, could you make out her features? And which programs would your Administration start to ensure that she got enough braid hair and didn't have to fill her shit in with goldenrod pipe cleaners?
Who would win in a fight: You or a Klondike Bar?
Be sure to tune in tonight, ABC! 10PM! to see her answer questions that we all know she's rehearsed the answers to just shy of the number of ninjas who've beat Bristol's budussy (OnTheRecord: 'Tis some bullshit...cuz we all know young, ninjas don't wanna be daddies!) "America's" dying to hear the answers to.