Tuesday, December 2, 2008

WHO Told Harpo To JOCK Me?

Title don't really have shit to do with the post, but I just likez the way it sounds!

Ok, so Saturday night I got one of the best texts of my LIFE!

My girl Courtney, or 'NeNe' (no ATL Housewives) is what we call'er, texted me to ask if I was free Tuesday night.
Instantly, I was like, **eyeroll** "Oh, gawd: another tresome invite." Don't this fucka's know my pussy's sign says: CERRADO So I didn't respond immediately.
But being the cool azz bia bia that I am, I said, "Let me text her back. She might need a ride. She might need to borrow some money for a midnight abortion. She might need some money for her midnight abortion and a ride afterward. Shit! I don't know." So I texted back.

And guess what this heffa asked me, via Myspace comment?
"Me+YOU=Color Purple and cast party Tuesday night??? Call me"

**does a Negro version of "Riverdance" out of pure excitement**

I've been feenin' to get tickets to this show worse than the corners of Lil Boosie's mouth been itchin' to be wiped, man!
Ever since I heard my Baby Mama #1, Oprah Winfrey, was bringing the classic movie to Broadway, I knew I had to slaing some boodussy save my chips to peep the show LIVE.
Back in '06, me and my girl, NicaMiff, was supposed to go see it in DC in '06, but ninjas got piss poor (but not morally...unless you count the fact that she got me to 'dro tokin' that same summer, but that's neither here nor there).
Me and my girl Millie T were planning to go to the Daygo ("San Diego" for your outtatowners) but shit just never popped off.

Anywhoo, I say all that to say this:

I'm going to Color Purple tonight, bitchezzzzz!!!
And then the cast party after!! WHOOO HOOOOOO!!!!
Too bad Fantasia isn't starring in the SD production. Aww, man! [/Swiper]
I'd <3 to see her and Young Dro. Moreso Young Dro cuz LAWD KNOWS I lovez me half-an-inch-from-ugly, 1 minute to midnight man! And he got lips that I'd like to introduce to the space between my hips...

Ok, **turning off Horndog switch** look how Alt-Hip Rocker Nerd Fat Femme Fab I'll be looking tonight!

I'm rockin' my crispy white button up, black pinstriped vest, Lane Breezy RightFit (tightfit!) denim, black pleather bomber, and accessories out the arsehole!!
I'm at work mad impatiently counting the hours down 'til showtime.
I'm like a late 90s Jennifer Love Hewitt flick, mayne: I CAN'T HARDLY WAIT!!!
And PLEASE BELIEVE!, since I'm going to the theatre directly after work, I got the vodka on chilly willy in the lunchroom refrigerator. Wonder how long it'll take these nosey muhfuckas to realize that that water AIN'T freezin'.

Have any of you seen my baby mama's Broadway endeavor?

If so, HOW WAS IT?


shespeakz said...

The show was very good...long but good. I saw it in LA last year and its just an all around bomb show. Have fun Girl!!! Im Jealous :-( lol

TrulyPosh said...

you'll ♥ it, savvy. Harpo and her team did the damn thang and brought both the book and the movie to the stage. i saw it on Broadway in '07 and purchased damn near every souvenir to savor the occasion....enjoy!

Assertive Wit said...

I've seen it and it was FANTASTIC! I was into it from the beginning to the end. I went with a girlfriend as well and we had a pretty okay evening even tho her Bitter Betty chose to rear it's ugly head after the show but it was fine by me...the show was at the FOX theater and I live around the corner so I wasn't in the car with her long enough to care about her bitterness LOL...glad you got to see it!

Anonymous said...

have fun

nica said...

oh shit bitch!!! how was it!! and dayum y u didn't txt her back and say i was gonna go?? u know i woulda been there too!! now i have to reeval or frenship....and y u tellin them people on the blog i'm the one that got u sparkin and tokin??!! u was willing i didn't force it on ya!