Thursday, August 7, 2008

Words of Wisdom

What's up, my folkeration!

How's err'bawday doin' on this fiiinne Friday, Jr aka Thursday?

I still feel bad about that time that I left you, without a Savvy blog to get fresh to for all those days. My bad, dawgs!
But...Trilly, it's been a difficult past month or so for your girl.
I lost my baby. My car is sick. I'm dayum near about to lose my freedom if I don't go on vacation QUICK. So needless to say, nobody's smilin' over this way.


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But, during that time of rejection and reflection, I've grown mad insightful. And below is some insight I'd like to share with you.
Like to hear it?! Hear it, hoe!

1) Ninjaz are only as courageous as their dicks are long.
If they're workin' with a monster, they're most likely a beast. If they're workin' with weenis, then all communicae should CEASE!
Cuz, in my personal experience, you'll ask that tiny-dicked, punk muthafucka to go on a romantic weekend with just the two of you and he'll tell you to "plan it and send me the itinerary; I'll go anywhere you want to go" gettin' ya azz ALLLL excited to spend some time nuzzled up under his shit-for-breff azz all so he can ignore your emails, texts, phone calls once you try to finalize shit and you'll NEVER HEAR FROM HIM AGAIN!
Yeah, bitch! I'm talkin' to YOU, homey!! FUCK YOU and that half of a Vienna Sausage you call a dick! Yeah, the head was tremendous, but YOUR DICK WAS NOT THE BIZNESS!!!!
**fanning self**

2)Ninjaz like bitches with glasses cuz them blind azz bitches cain't see they PUNK AZZES!
Ever see a nice lookin' dude with a bitch on Helen Keller status, with microscopes AND telescopes and a seeing eye rottweiller leading her way?
Ever wonder, "WUHT DUH BLUHDCLOT?!?!"
Well...WONDER NO MORE!! cuz I dun' just laced ya tennis shoes. Ninjaz like a bitch to stay in the dark about what bastards they are! And if the bitch cain't see how many fingers he's throwing up, he most likely cain't see the fact that he's been fuckin' somebody else for MONTHS and MONTHS, either.
My perfect-vision and purrday homegirl just got pushed to the side for a bitch rockin' a Ray Charles set of eyes. And the bitch ain't even CUTE!!!! Looks like a substitute teacher, circa 1983.
But...that's what the nigga wanted! And...no need to cry over spilled Similac, M.T. That ninj STILL got umbilical fluid behind his ears, anyway. Even though the dick was gravy, did you see yourself changing Pull-Ups for that much longer?!

3)Fat bitches are another fat bitch's worst enemy.
Everybody nose Savvy is mosdef a fatty.

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A fresh, fly, fantabulous fat biatch at that, Jack!

Regardless of how high my fly meter goes, I got NUHFCHIN' but LOVE for AALLLL my Torrid and Lane Bryant shoppers.
Anybody with a multi-pack of chins and/or bellays is AW'IGHT WITH ME!!!! We gotta stick together like moist legs on hot leather, mayne!

But...apparently this countray azz, double-dutch lip rockin' bitch don't feel the same.
I asked this ho for a favor. Put ME own for MAH city, OWN OWN for mah city; something MAD simple. This bitch was like, "Whoops! My bad. I forgot!" But, regardless of how many times I've asked, she NEVER does the favor. So I ask and ask and ask, but get no results so now I'm reachin' for my ski mask and my hammer mad fast!
But I'm done with askin' for favors cuz I can do my own thang; be my OWN LifeSaver.
So, my girl thinks it's hate and competition: Another fat bia don't want to see another fat bia comin' up. ESPECIALLY when that other fat bia is OLDER and HOTTER. (<--Yeezzzz!)
This whole sitcho-ayshun is just another case of Fat Girls in a Barrel syndrome...and I cain't stand it!

So...the plot thickens: One day I'm checkin' her shit and I see a post that is ALMOST EXACTLY THE SAME as one I'd postly previously posted. I'm like, "Hold up: WAAIIIITTT!!!" My shit wasn't good enough before, but now you're basically bitin' my stee? Okay, Station Wagon Lips: I GOTCHU!
But, my Ladies of Lane Bryant, the moral to this story is: We're a movement by ourself; but an earthquake when we're together!
We need to stick together and support one another cuz it's not that many of us reppin' for us and it SURELY ain't that many who are ON!
So I say: EFF competition when there's room for all of us to be winnin', RIGHT?!?!?!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Awww...Thanks Savvy, couldn't have said it better myself! Always looking out for ya girls AND feeling the emotions (and in this case, skyrocketing blood pressure) right along with us. Love ya more than words...true amiga! That's right Savv-age, put it ALL out there!

Anonymous said...

Amen Savvy!

LMMFBAO @ number 1

suga said...

Dont you HATE IT, when you give lil peen a chance, and the lil peen grows on you and you actually start to like lil peen a whole hell of a lot, despite the lil peenage? Then lil peen wants to act all funny style, and it makes u mad because he not only acted up, but he's acting up AND is rockin' the lil peen, which is like 42 violations, in and of itself.

And lets not forget to mention this planning sh*t and a mofo wanna disappear. This is why I dont plan a damn thang. He's gotta plan it and I'm not packing until 30 min before we're supposed to leave, just to make sure I dont waste my time on something that aint happenin'.